An Effective Pain & Suffering Argument

Yesterday our family went bowling, which if you have kids and seldom go, it can be pretty entertaining. We won’t talk about who won, but we’ll just say that when Dorothy got two strikes in a row after having lost the first game, she was pretty giddy. As we were having a great time, a small group of young guys and one girl in her late teens (maybe 20 years old), came to the lane next to ours. All of them were bowling, and my daughter informed me later that the girl was getting a bunch of strikes, but she was not happy. Her sadness had nothing to do with the game. You could tell it was that inner, spiritual void, a life-less sadness, a person bitter and mad at life, others and God. She was wearing mostly dark colors, her black jeans almost completely tore apart (by design), which reflected the state of her soul. 

Well, you know how when life is going along quite normally, and all of a sudden the Holy Spirit deep down within says, “You were just taking it easy and enjoying your time with family, but I have some serious business for you to tend to right now.”? Yup, no question, I was to go and talk to these young people about Christ. I had a feeling what would happen… 

When our game was over I went over to the group and offered them gospel tracts. The guys were pretty receptive and took the tracts, but the girl- I could see the embarrassed smirk rising (embarrassment for me, not for her) accompanied by the thought, “Oh brother, here comes the Christian.” She didn’t say anything while I was giving them tracts, but as I was walking away I heard her say something under her breath to the effect of, “Why would you try to talk to me, I’m an atheist!” So I turned around to clarify what she said, and then asked her, “Why are you an atheist?” She replied perhaps the most repeated charge against God, “If there really is a God, then why is there so much pain and suffering in the world?” Case closed. It was clear that she has been satisfied with that answer for a long time to disprove the existence of God in her mind. I replied to her that I personally have found answers to the question of reconciling God and the problem of pain, which have been satisfactory to me, and that I think most of the time the problem is not a lack of answers, but a lack of willingness to hear the answers. To which, at my surprise she did not have a comeback, so I proceeded with this line of reasoning…  

I asked her, “Are you hoping one day to have a family? Children?” Her answer was, “Yeah, if I choose not to have an abortion.” O…K…. “Do you want to bear children that you will actually give birth to and raise?” She complied, “Yes.” So I reasoned, “So you would bring a child into this world, against their own will, knowing that they would experience pain and suffering?” This changed the moment in our interaction. She had previously been looking straight forward, not at me, but at this point she turned and looked at me. Her face said, “How dare you say something to me like that, but at the same time I understand and see how it’s true. I don’t know what to say, but I’m angry, confused, enlightened, don’t agree and do agree all at the same time.” Her mouth began to open, but nothing came out. So I continued, “You wouldn’t bring a child into the world so that they would experience suffering. You would do it for life and joy and happiness. Nevertheless, you said you would knowing what that child would encounter. So you are a lot like God. He brought you into this world, knowing you would suffer to a degree, but He brought you into the world for life’s sake, for joy and happiness.” I let that settle in a little bit, then said, “We may not understand everything, but if we think that God is evil when we would do the same thing without thinking twice about it, then we should question ourselves before we question the goodness of God.” I then encouraged her to read the first three chapters of Genesis with the comment, “God made everything very good. It was our choices that brought pain and suffering into the world. If there is anyone to credit for life and peace it is God, if there is anyone to blame for evil it is mankind ourselves.” 

To my surprise there was no response to any of this, so it was a good moment to insert the Gospel into the conversation (I did not say the following to her word for word, but it is exactly how I would have if I had another shot at the conversation). “The Bible teaches us the true heart of God in these matters. Jesus did not come into the world to condemn the world, but to save it. Before the foundations of the world, before we ever sinned, God had already planned a way for us to be forgiven, healed and eternally blessed. In the same way we would do anything to alleviate the suffering of our children, God gave himself, his own Son, to suffer in our place, so that we could be healed in every way. You as a person would bring a child into a painful world, knowing that you do not have the ability to be a substitute for some or most of their sufferings. But God brought us into the world, already having planned how He would be our substitute on the cross.” 

I left the conversation at that, encouraging her to reconsider her views about God. If you think of her, raise a prayer on her behalf for the walls of deception to be torn down and the light of the Gospel to shine into her heart. 

I hope this line of reasoning is a help to you as you help others come to know Christ. 

One more thing. As we left the alley, one of my daughters said, “When we started playing the game I had a bad attitude (she didn’t do so hot on the scoreboard), but when I noticed that girl, how sad she was even though she was getting so many strikes, it made me think how much worse life could be than mine, and also that I have nothing really to be upset about.” I was glad to hear how God’s grace is at work in her. 

“Thank you God for coming into our lives, breaking into our lives with your love and mercy and grace! You are the true God, the everlasting heavenly Father, our great Redeemer and Friend! We love you! May we behold the birth of many, many more into your family! Amen”